Amy’s Day 22 of the 28 Day Simply Raw Detox

Hello my beautifuls

Welcome to my last blog about my experience with the 28 Day Simply Raw Detox Program.  www.simplyraw.ca As I reflect back on the initial reasons for commencing the detox, I think of things like better skin, lose the winter adipose layer and clarity of thought.  I am comfortable with this list; this list is nice, pleasant and well, lets be honest, pretty damnb fluffy!  So yes, I was into giving the detoxification program a try because I expected a pleasant journey with positive experiences each and every day, however back in the real world my detoxification experience was anything but fluffy!  I was blessed with the extrodinary experience of what I call ’getting real’.  Initially I was cruising through the days with effortless ease, happy, healthy, glowing and fulfilling the initial list of buffing up my outside.  I was thinking, “gees this is a walk in the park; this is the nicest thing anyone could ever do for themselves, what a treat”, then whamm…. we were hit with a big run of grey skies and my mood sunk into the mud of my burried quagmire of un-addressed, supressed and festering emotional wounds.

In my life my overall state of emotion has been happy.  Actually, upon reflection I have had one of the most exciting and blessed lives that I have heard of.  I have been manifesting most of my desires since the age of 21 however that doesn’t mean that I don’t have disappointments or insecurities, and upsets do occur in my life just like everyone else.  During the detox “I got real”!  I discovered that I had spent so much time focussing on being happy, prodctive, grateful, pleasant, supportive, inspired and peaceful that I forgot to acknowledge and address my shadow side.  I buried the shadows (my insecurities and upsets) in a continual life of motion.  No time to focus on being slighted, no time to stop and address mistreatment, I just had to keep marching forward with a smile because nothing could stop me and I didn’t let the little things on life falter my mad dash toward…. hmmmm what is it that I am dashing too?  Great question!  During the detox, I stopped and pondered this and other questions at length; questions like what am I doing, what is my purpose and where am I going?   At my age, you would expect that I had asked these questions previously, but no… I’ve been too busy dashing from this project to that, from this location to that…. I am in constant motion.  Okay, so I stopped and got real, then I got mad… I dredged up all sorts of mistreatments ” how dare the previous owners of our home forget to disclose $100 000.00 worth of issues”  ”how dare the home inspectors not be liable to tell the home buyer anything more in-depth than be sure to calk your windows.”  ”how dare Dave’s ex-wife send hate mail to me via her child”   I compiled a huge stack of incidents that in my opinion where wrong doings.  I got angry, I felt every little bit of pissed-off-ness that I had always shyed away from because I didn’t want display my inner bitch,  I wanted to be spiritual and I wanted to send love to all of the complete assholes that have crossed my path.  I didn’t want to acknowledge that my husband and I are like a red flag to bill padders, squatters and leeches etc…  Dave and I work so hard and give so much, I didn’t understand why karmatically speaking we had been dealt what I consider dead weight.  I felt sorry for myself and exhausted by the number of people Dave and I were supporting and giving to.

Then as I was going through my list of the many ways I had been wronged….something beautiful happened!  After I felt the anger and disappointment I had this overwhelming feeling of gratitude wash over me.  Thank you to each and every person who has stolen from me, used me, lied to me, let me down, left me hanging etc…   in the middle of this wallowing I was consumed by a feeling of love and genuine gratitude.  I got it!  These challenging people are gifts to me.  They are the catalyst for  my growth.  They are the challenges that show my true colors and my ability to be unconditional in my beliefs.  They are giving me my opportunity to shine!  As I got real, I released the conditioned Amy who believes “you should love all, you should forgive all, you should smile always”.  As I detox, these little pockets of unresolved emotion and old outdated ways of being are bubbling up to be released.

Blessings,

Amy